Seriously, what is it about jeans?
Based on what I gather from normies (aka people without eating disorders), buying jeans sucks. And, from my own experiences, I concur.
So I have come to this grand, profound, worldly conclusion: buying jeans majorly sucks.
After going into treatment, I obviously had some changes in my body (shocking!) that made me a little uncomfortable with my body. You know what’s worse than having to adapt to appreciating and loving a new body after treatment?????? TRYING TO DO THAT WHILE WEARING CLOTHES THAT DON’T FIT COMFORTABLY. It’s horrible.
After months of avoiding shopping, or only buying easy things like dresses and flowy shirts, I hit a wall. This wall had a name: fall. The seasons changed and the weather turned a bit cold and suddenly my Nike shorts and t-shirts were not going to cut it for day-to-day fashion. I needed to buy new jeans that I could wear without falling into a horrible body image tail-spin. So I got up the courage and asked my mom to take me to buy new pants.
I did it, I survived and you can too! My therapist and I came up with a game plan (yay coping ahead #dbt4ever). These helpful tips worked for me and hopefully they can help you out too!
- DO NOT GO SHOPPING ON A PARTICULARLY BAD BODY IMAGE DAY: DO NOT DO IT. I FORBID YOU. IT’S JUST A HORRIBLE IDEA AND WE BOTH KNOW IT, SO DON’T DO IT.
- DO NOT GO BY YOURSELF: Take someone with you, but be mindful of who you choose. Do not take anyone who you find triggering in any way, may make comments that are unhelpful, you will compare yourself too, you don’t trust, or who isn’t up to date on your goals and sensitivities around shopping.
- DO NOT TRY ON YOUR PREVIOUS SIZES: This one may be more of a case by case tip, but as a general rule, don’t try on the size that you currently own that does not fit anymore. For me, the jeans I had did still fit, but a different size would have made me much more comfortable. I took my “current” size and the next two sizes up into the dressing room and I tried on the next bigger size first. If they were two big I would go down and if they were too small I would go up a size.
- THINK COMFORT, NOT MIRRORS: You probably don’t have an accurate perception of your body, which makes it really hard to buy clothes because you don’t like the way your body looks in pretty much anything. So here’s a groundbreaking idea, don’t look in the mirror. Put it on, take a minute and feel yourself in the clothes; stand up, sit down, squat, jumping jacks, walk or run or whatever you want and really, really see how they FEEL.
- ASK YOUR COCONSPIRATORS OPINION: IF they feel good, ask your friend/parent or whomever if they look okay, this is why you need to bring someone you really love and trust since you can’t make an unbiased decision, it is necessary to have someone who can give you a real, helpful and non-triggering input into your buying choices.
- TRUST YOUR NON-EATING DISORDER GUT AND JUST BUY IT: Tell your damn eating disorder to shut up and leave you alone. You’ll look amazing in anything you wear as long as it fits, your comfortable and you’re happy.
Endnote: no one gives a crap about your clothing size. Literally, no one cares. Wear what fits, what you like and what you want.
So go out, buy some clothes that fit and make you happy and comfortable and continue to shine!